How to Cope with Divorce
- Mums Tips
- Parenting Skills
- Published on Friday, 29 March 2019 16:02
- Last Updated on 29 March 2019
- Monica Costa
- 0 Comments
Nobody goes into a marriage planning for divorce, but it’s an all-too-common outcome. While you might have experienced the very worst of relationship breakups in the past, divorce is very different. There are obligations and legal matters to take into account, and it can be all too easy to fall into unhealthy ways of coping. No matter how long you’ve been married for, where you live, or the reasons for your divorce, there are some healthy and proactive coping strategies that can help smooth the entire process and make it easier for you to start moving on and looking to the future. While nobody will expect a divorce to be emotionally easy, these coping strategies could help more than you think.
Plan and Prepare
The more that you plan your life before and during a divorce the easier it will be to prioritise. No divorce is going to be simple, and there may be factors that make it even more complex. Shared mortgages or international marriages add a whole new level of complication, so make sure that you address those by speaking it a lawyer who is experienced with international divorce procedures or the unique factors that make your divorce complex.
It’s going to take time. How long a divorce takes will depend on your personal situation, but it’s vital that you don’t let the need to be separated dictate your decision making. You might want the whole thing to be over as quickly as possible, but that can lead to rash decisions that you regret in the future. Always take your time and make sure that you are protected for your future as much as possible.
Get Off Social Media
It can be very easy to get sucked into social media. Whether you’re using it as nothing more than a distraction, or using it for more negative behaviours such as stalking your ex, it’s rarely a good idea to fall into the trap of venting on public platforms. By avoiding social media, you will feel less pressure, and you will also be able to avoid those public spats that can have a very negative effect on your emotional well-being.
Look After Yourself
It might be tempting to skip meals or throw yourself into work. While these can start as minor distractions, they can result in long-term negative outcomes. You’re going to need all of your strength and emotional focus to get through a divorce, so take the time to look after yourself. Makes sure that you eat, and get some exercise in as well. If there are children involved, it will be important that you show them that you are coping well, and your healing will be much easier to accomplish too.
While divorce is never going to be a simple or easy process, the quicker that you accept what’s happening, the easier it will be to start moving on and rebuilding your life. Failing to adopt healthy coping strategies will simply mean that your healing process will take longer, and that can have devastating consequences on your health, your career, and your future happiness.
Monica Costa founded London Mums in September 2006 after her son Diego’s birth together with a group of mothers who felt the need of meeting up regularly to share the challenges and joys of motherhood in metropolitan and multicultural London. London Mums is the FREE and independent peer support group for mums and mumpreneurs based in London https://londonmumsmagazine.com and you can connect on Twitter @londonmums